


The Very Secret Diaries of Anne Boleyn (Which Are Very Historical And Not Made Up At All)

by Grey_Bard, Kadorienne



Category: The Tudors
Genre: Gen, Humor, Very Secret Diary
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-04
Updated: 2011-05-04
Packaged: 2017-10-18 23:17:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/194378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grey_Bard/pseuds/Grey_Bard, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kadorienne/pseuds/Kadorienne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hats worn: 2<br/>Times the King eyed me: 4<br/>Times the King eyed my sister: 6</p><p>Drowning my sorrows in malmsy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Very Secret Diaries of Anne Boleyn (Which Are Very Historical And Not Made Up At All)

**June the seventh, in the Year of Our Lord 1532**

Hats worn: 2  
Times the King eyed me: 4  
Times the King eyed my sister: 6

Drowning my sorrows in malmsy.

Still not Queen.

 

 **June the twenty third, in the Year of Our Lord 1532**

Bible in English full of dirty stories. Better not tell King.

Not Queen yet.

 

 **June the twenty fifth, in the Year of Our Lord 1532**

Sir Thomas More made the oddest noise today, it sounded like WhoreOfBabylon, but that can't be right. There aren't any Babylonians at court.

Hats worn: 1  
Times the King eyed me: 2  
Times the King eyed my sister: 0

Diary, I am counting this as a win!

Still not Queen, though.

 

 **July the nineteeth, in the Year of Our Lord 1532**

Jousting tournament today. V. thrilling. King beat everyone. He's so wonderful and good at everything!

Hats worn: 3.

Not Queen today either.

 

 **August the fourth, in the Year of Our Lord 1532**

King invited us to a musical recital tomorrow, v. excited. Works of his own composition! How can he be so wonderful and good at everything?

Hats worn: 3 (I have a lovely new nightcap!)  
Times the King eyed me: 3  
Times the King eyed my sister: 3

 

 **August the fifth, in the Year of Our Lord 1532**

King invited us to a musical recital today, was v. excited. Works were his own composition. How can it be? He's usually so wonderful and good at everything...

Hats worn: 2  
Times the King eyed anyone: Don't care

MORE MALMSY NOW.

Still not Queen.

 

 **February the third, in the Year of Our Lord 1533**

Went to see my brother this morning. Found Mark Smeaton coming out of brother's chambers with lute. Said he was asking George's advice on purchasing new codpiece.

Think Smeaton might be kinda gay.

Hats worn: 2.  
Times the King eyed me: 5 and a half (that boring More interrupted him mid-eye).  
Times the King eyed my sister: 1.

Go me! But still not Queen.

P.S. Have wild craving for apples. WTH?

**Author's Note:**

> Grey Bard's notes: "Inspired by Kadorienne's LolTudor graphic which illustrates this fic."
> 
> Kadorienne's notes: "This was inspired when I saw a copy of The Secret Diary of Anne Boleyn by Robin Maxwell in a bookstore. I immediately remembered Cassie Claire's brilliant and seminal [Very Secret Diary of Aragorn](http://www.ealasaid.com/misc/vsd/aragorn.html) and the associations were inevitable.  
> Thank you to bunnster and lafemmedarla for helping me find the right scene to cap for this."


End file.
